The Day I Became Pro Life and Why I Still Am

I was (am) somewhat terrified to write and publish this post. I don't want my motley number of followers or readers diminishing, or people to take offense. But, I read posts with different viewpoints. In fact, I enjoy reading posts from writers with radically different worldviews. It helps me understand them, work through the issue, and refine my own thoughts. This won't be a harsh, judgmental, or isolating spiel. Instead, it will be heartfelt reflection. 

I remember the day I became pro-life.
I was six.
We were at the fair, and I was obediently following my parents around different stands and displays, waiting patiently for the fun to begin. We children were allowed one ride at that time, a dull jaunt in a circle on a black pony. Still, at six, the sights, sounds, and wonders of the fair was awe inspiring.
We were inside on of the buildings that house various displays. The salty smell of popcorn and the sickening sweet smell of taffy tickled my nose, and my eyes scanned the displays with a bowl of candy in the front. Those were the best. My parents were too frugal and blessed with offspring  to buy any of the luscious treat offered, so a few bites of complementary candy rounded out my fair experience.

My mother stopped at a stand--void of candy--and began one of her typical friendly conversations with the woman manning it. I noticed that instead of boring banners, a sundry of kitchen instruments, or the litany of random tokens typically offered, there were miniature dollies in shells. They reminded me of the nesting dolls my aunt brought me from Russia, although I called them "big and littles".  They started ever so tiny and weird to what I recognized to be an image of a full term baby in utero. It looked just like the picture on the front of my mom's pregnancy magazine. With my mother's permission, I played with those baby nesting-like dolls until it was time to go.The stand lady offered me a sticker and I accepted. Stickers are awesome when you're six. I stared at the flat oval and read the message.

"Mommy, why does it same Pro Life," I asked.

"Because some people aren't pro life, honey. Sometimes, people don't want their babies in their bellies."

I stared at my mother's rounded belly where my new baby brother or sister lived, happily growing. 

Who wouldn't want a baby?

"So they're pro death?" 

My childish mind reasoned that the opposite of life is death (which it is).

"No, honey, they're something called pro choice," my mother responded as she guided her children through the sea of people. 

I glanced again at my sticker, then stuck it proudly to my shirt.
That was the end of the discussion that day. My mother didn't need to fill my brain with conservative jargon. At six, I'd seen her body grow a new life multiple times. I understood life and why I was for it.

Many years have passed since six year old Susie learned that the opposite of pro life is pro choice. I've read magazines, books, and articles from both sides--particularly the pro choice side. I've learned why women fight so hard for abortive rights, and I've seen the misunderstanding on both sides. However, every resource I've read only causes me to grow more adamant in my stand of pro life.  I've yet to find a convincing argument that tempts me to the pro choice side. I've read articles about other issues that raise convincing arguments, but not about pro life versus pro choice.
Supposedly it is about women's health, our rights, our bodies, and our freedoms. And if it had to do solely with our own bodies, then I would understand. I would.

However, a pregnant woman carries within her another life. The tiny cluster of a baby develops a heartbeat at around three weeks after conception, and before many women even realize their pregnant. A heartbeat. The gentle thud of life. The pregnant woman is exhausted, sick, swollen, and aching because her body is working to grow a life. Some people are so harsh as to compare the growing fetus to a tumor. But a tumor does not have a heartbeat, sprouting limbs, fingers, toes, a brain, growing lungs, and everything that makes us human and alive.

So when a woman demands control over her own body, then of course, give her control over her own body. But too many women forget that their bodies houses another. One innocent, vulnerable, and protected by the womb of its mother. A woman's fertility and  body is a beautiful, intricate piece of art. Our bodies are designed to nurture, grow, and form tiny humans. Life is created inside of us, and we are honored by being able to carry it.
Recently, the state of Texas moved to make abortions after 20 weeks illegal. 20 week, when most expectant parents find out the gender of their little one. At 20 weeks, a baby is a tiny human, being nurtured, fed, and grown inside the womb. Proponents of later abortions argue that a baby cannot yet survive outside the womb, so it cannot be counted as a person yet. Of course it cannot survive outside the womb yet. It's not supposed to. A baby at 20 weeks is designed to grow inside the mother--it is the beginning of the cycle of life. The womb is its natural habitat. It is where it is designed to live. Life is grown, nurtured, and crafted in the womb. The baby is prepared in there for his entrance into the world. It should be the safest place on earth.

We've come to a place (again) in the world where fertility and womanhood are seen as dangerous specimens. Abortion isn't just used (or even primarily) for the rape victim, or the woman whose life is in danger (more disputed, difficult territory), but as a form of contraception. It is a final safety net for those who committed the act, and started growing a life that they decided they didn't want. Life is something we handle so carelessly. In a world filled with contraceptive methods, resources, parents seeking children for adoption, and one that judges unwed mothers far less harshly than  the rest of history, abortion is used as contraceptive.

I'm not pro life because I am naive enough to think a pregnancy cannot emerge from rape. I'm not pro life because I want to punish other women by making them carry children. Or because I want to break the hearts of the young, the frightened, or the injured.  I'm not pro life because I disrespect womanhood or fertility. On the contrary, I am pro life because I cherish life. I respect life. I see life as a gift, something created and precious. I see fertility and the female body as an inspiring, beautiful creation. I want to love and care for the young, frightened, or injured. I see being human as a struggle, a burden, and a blessing. I am pro life because ending a life unwarranted cannot be a sexual safety net or a human right. It's not just about babies or fetuses. It's not just about the tiny unborn. It's about the tiny unborn and the wrinkled elderly, and everyone in between.